Ich kann nicht anders.

Dear Wrestling,

I've cancelled my WWE network subscription. I have one last ticket, to a RAW before Summerslam, but I'm trying to give that away.

I have a good footing in New Japan now, and I have a beloved local promotion I attend monthly: given that WWE isn't my only source for wrestling anymore, I've decided to stop watching. To be clear, not only is not my only source, it's also the worst wrestling I watch in a week.

"Worst?? I thought you loved Kevin Owens! What about the New Day, they're why started you loving wrestling in the first place!"

Moral calculus is hard and brittle. I'm doing the best I can, and I assume those men are as well. This is what matters most to me, right now, in no particular order:

1. Hulk Hogan is a racist. He said so himself. Some of the best wisdom I've ever heard is Maya Angelou's "When someone tells you who they are, believe them. The first time."  He has made no sincere apology that I have seen, and has definitely not performed any actions that would show such an apology to be internalized and life-changing.

2. Vince McMahon is a fascist. He has his own small empire (and I use that term in the full historical sense, as an entity which has colonies from which it removes wealth while providing nothing of substance in return) and now that we have a fascist in the White House, he has redoubled his efforts to promote hatred and xenophobia--more than usual. His wife works for that evil administration, and he has at least once used its propaganda in a storyline (Sami Zayn and Bobby Lashley's "sisters").

3. My money doesn't go to support the wrestlers or their families practically at all. My understanding is that they get almost nothing from the network, around $3 on t shirts, etc. To be honest, I won't be noticed in my absence, let alone missed.

4. The writing is atrocious. It would have been dated and out of touch in the 90s, let alone now. Last week I heard Seth Rollins make a sheep-shagger joke about Drew McIntyre. In 2018. It was once much, MUCH worse of course, and this is taken as permission to remain lazy and dismal.

5. WWE retain an insane level of control of their workers, while giving none of the benefits associated in the modern world with working for a large corporation--health insurance, vacation, a work-life balance...

6. Much of this to say, these workers need to unionize desperately. I could see an argument for independent wrestlers remaining as they are, but WWE workers are at the (nonexistent) mercy of one man, ultimately, and a man who has proven at every chance that he does not have their well-being in mind.

There's more, of course, but this is what comes to mind easily. I just can't bear paying for the privilege of being disrespected as a human being on a weekly basis, not anymore. If the analogy is that it's 1938 again, and I believe we are in a version of that era, then I can't keep buying Bayer, I'm not buying a new Volkswagen, etc. Not when there are options that don't cause me to have a moral crisis every time the bill comes due.

Finally let me stress most of all that I understand deeply the need for escape in this world. I absolutely approve of that impulse, it is one that keeps us sane, as much as possible. I would never presume to make this decision for someone else: it's painful enough to make for me. I don't say any of this to judge or shame someone for choosing differently. This is my place to communicate with my own little god of Wrestling, and that's all.

I do still love those wrestlers. I hope they do well and stay healthy.

Love,
Autumn